I woke up so angry and sad. My hometown bar is closing, last night was their final night. I spent most Friday and Saturday nights from the age of 35-39 there. I wasn’t going to go, actually the one person I thought would ask me didn’t even ask me (hurt feeling #1). Then I was asked by someone unexpected. At first I said yes but then common sense kicked in. First the group of girls I used to go with,…
If you have ever read my blog or not, my biggest personal growth this year was reading A Course in Miracles. It’s a book compromised of a reading section, a workbook section and a teachers manuel. I am on the workbook section now which is a lesson a day for 365 days. I start everyday reading the workbook. I’m currently on lesson 181. Like any spiritual path, A Course of Miracles is not a religion, it is a way of…
yesterday was a bad multiple sclerosis day. I know those happen too. After my rant I posted, I fell. I’m very grateful I didn’t hurt myself but I’m more grateful that the glass vase that broke wasn’t one of the ones my mom painted. I did break a vase and knocked over a vase that held all the fresh lavender I had still from my sister’s wedding 7 years ago. The little pieces of lavender ended up all over me…
lily Tomlin I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific. ~ Lily Tomlin I saw this on a bloggers post that I follow and just loved it. http://wp.me/p3moai-CB They say in A Course in Miracles studies that when you ask the universe for what you want, be specific. Don’t just say I want enough money. Say you want an abundance of money so you can afford to really live life to its fullest…
This is probably my favorite song. Its meaning translated to me towards a breakup to start. It has evolved since I started reading A Course in Miracles. It’s become the battle with my Ego mind over my inner guide. It’s become my anthem. My choice over who is going to win. It is my choice. I have learned my ego isn’t my friend. It has guided me in the wrong direction and creating a very unhappy world. I’m so very…
I never commented on this picture yesterday. I found this on a U2’s website written in Bono’s handwriting but signed by Bono, Edge, Adam and Larry. I don’t know if it’s going to be a new song or if it was just something they were doodling but it was so fitting and they’re my favorite. Yesterday I wrote to my coach before I spoke to her and asked her to read my blog. I received an email that simply said…
The following are conversations I had with my life coach about ending things and the actions with the guy I was dating, the one with the 9 hour first date. The beginning part was in our session when I realized I didn’t want me to continue dating him, I wasn’t feeling the connection. She coached me to follow my inner guide, listen to my gut feeling and stay on my course of coming from a place of love. My struggle…
My poor daughter she gets the backlash of my mood swings so often. I woke up today on the wrong side of the bed. It wasn’t even because I knew the outcome of our next president either. I would never go online, check emails or even pick up my iPad before reading my course of miracle workbook. I just had a bad nights sleep and I was cranky. Being that I was up most of the night, I know my…
I always wondered what is going on in boomers mind when he looks outside. Boomer doesn’t get up and go outside easily you have to convince him so what is he thinking when he gazes? I’ve noticed lately I too have been glancing out my big window but I know what’s going on inside my mind. My life has become my apartment. The four walls of my home. As my MS has become worse I tend to stay home more…
I saw this quote one day and it rang true. “You’re only alone if you don’t like who you’re alone with.” I’ve always been that person who had trouble being alone. I never really liked myself. I hated my body thought I was fat, not worthy of good things, unlovable and didn’t have any value. I also on top of it had multiple sclerosis so who would accept me. I’ve lived my whole life with a low self esteem, no…
