I saw this quote one day and it rang true. “You’re only alone if you don’t like who you’re alone with.” I’ve always been that person who had trouble being alone. I never really liked myself. I hated my body thought I was fat, not worthy of good things, unlovable and didn’t have any value. I also on top of it had multiple sclerosis so who would accept me. I’ve lived my whole life with a low self esteem, no confidence and no self worth. I’d unfortunately choose men in my life who treated me mostly how I treated myself. It was a sad existence for a very long time.
It wasn’t until this past January when I started worked on myself listening to Kris Carr, Gabby Bernstein and mostly Marianne Williamson that things began to change. I started reading and doing the daily workbook in A Course of Miracles and really dedicating myself to change not only how I look at myself but how I perceive others. I’ve learned how to find peace and forgiveness to people of my past and to remember them from the loving place they originally came. I’ve learned to forgive and let go of my errors of my past that caused me pain, shame and embarrassment. However the most important lesson that I’ve learned is to be ok with me. To learn I have value and deserve love as does every other person in this world. I’ve learned I am an extraordinary person with amazing attributes but still no better or worse than anyone else. We are all created perfect and I am created perfect. I am becoming happy with me being me. I’m okay being alone with myself because I have everything I need inside to be happy and at peace. I’ve spent my life looking outside for someone or something to make me happy. I certainly wasn’t happy from the inside. Now I can stand alone and like the person I’m alone with. Sometimes she’s my favorite person to be with.