It’s been a strange couple of days. I’m finally able to start taking my high dose biotin again. If you read any of my other threads on biotin, and there are many, what mostly showed in the biotin is that my walking speed increased by seven seconds. This is according to my neurological test by my doctor. However I’ve stated, and I still stand by, that biotin helped do more. Besides noticing more weakness in my legs and hip area,…
I didn’t make any new vegan recipes this week. I also gained weight at weight watchers. I don’t know how it’s possible but it happened. My veganism may be coming to an end…but so far I have not stopped. Anyway, thought I’d post a song. This was actually my wedding song. I had the wrong “somebody” but I still believe he’ll come along one day. Somebody by Depeche Mode I want somebody to share Share the rest of my life…
It’s official, my match.com membership ends on May 17. I haven’t been really active on match since November. The last guy dated started off really good, it was my nine-hour date, the blog about it here https://multipleexperiences.org/2016/10/03/my-9-hour-best-first-date/. He was a nice guy, but it wasn’t for me. I put up many blogs about how I don’t want to date. I’m scared to date for a few reasons. It’s a funny feeling because I don’t want to be alone but I don’t want to…
I’m afraid to date. I’m afraid to be rejected again. I’m afraid to be hurt again. I’m afraid to fall in love again. I’m afraid of the pain. I’m afraid to have to explain the embarrassing MS symptoms again. I’m afraid of the embarrassment again. I’m afraid of the anxiety again. I’m even afraid of the excitement of it again. I’m afraid of the hope of it again. I’m afraid of the beginning, the middle, and the end. I’m just…
For the first time at probably two months I answered someone on match.com. I’m still under the same feeling that I don’t want to date, so I don’t really know why I reply, but her did. The conversation went back-and-forth for a bit and then I asked the question; did you actually read my profile, are you aware that I have a mess and I use a walker? Silence!!! I can’t say that I didn’t purposely say that for a…
At a nice dinner last night with my parents we briefly talked about my past relationships and any future relationships. I said something that finally was the truth about how I feel. I don’t want to date because I DON’T TRUST MYSELF YET and I don’t know if I ever will. I just know I NEVER WANT TO BE THAT GIRL I WAS AGAIN. Don’t they say abstinence is the best prevention. I made bad choices for myself. My ex-husband…
My life coach says I’m in a growth stage and not wanting to date is perfectly ok. I must admit, originally I thought I’d take a few weeks, a month off, then Boomer, my beloved English Bulldog died. In that grieving time, besides bonding and training a new puppy, I also got to a very good place in A Course in Miracles. I just felt good being alone. It wasn’t a matter of the multiple sclerosis, although that will always…
The following are conversations I had with my life coach about ending things and the actions with the guy I was dating, the one with the 9 hour first date. The beginning part was in our session when I realized I didn’t want me to continue dating him, I wasn’t feeling the connection. She coached me to follow my inner guide, listen to my gut feeling and stay on my course of coming from a place of love. My struggle…
Well good morning self sabotage, how you doing today? Yeah I know it’s all me. Making bad choices and then throwing my hands up. I’ve been writing this blog for three months you think that finally something with sink in, NAH. I have finally excepted that the chance of me losing the last 20 pounds is pretty slim. Would it be better for me with MS? Of course but I think there comes a point where your body just…
He comes to the door with this humongous bouquet of flowers. I’ve gotten roses before probably picked up at the nearest supermarket but it was obviously nothing like this. I was speechless which is rare for me. Before I met my husband my dating life wasn’t anything to write home about. I was awkward as a teenager and insecure throughout my twenties and thirties. When I met the ex-husband he was the first guy that really liked me that the…
