I was thinking the other day, what if there was a magic pill to cure multiple sclerosis? What if I can take something that not only stops future disability but cures current disability? What if tomorrow I could actually walk again? I have spent half my life with MS. It is part of my identity, even though I pretend it isn’t. Who am I without my disease? I have this recurring dream that I’m working but still collecting disability. In…
We arrived at Monday once again. I feel like I am on a fast track through these days, weeks, months and years. That is saying something considering most of my days are spent in front of the TV. I am far from highly stimulated most days. Yet the days are going fast. I know I’ve said this many times before. I’m sorry I’m repeating myself. I just find it amazing sometimes. I got to spend a few hours with my…
Well another episode started off an otherwise lovely evening. My mom and stepdad were coming over for dinner and to watch Yellowstone. We missed last week’s episode so we were in for a double feature. It was just about 4:00 when I hung up with my mother. I was getting up to feed my puppies. I didn’t transfer to my wheelchair well. I ended up sliding down to the floor. When I got up I would have taken the increase…
Well yesterday was a visit to my neurologist. I want to thank my pseudo uncle for driving my van. I am not so comfortable driving on the parkways anymore. My first words to my neurologist were “did you miss me?” I have been coming to see him for almost 24 years. I just turned 50, that is almost 1/2 my life. He has been on my multiple sclerosis journey from day 1. He was the neurologist that told me I…
I had a really good birthday day. I woke in a very cheery. I just stayed that way all day. How could I not? Every second I was either on the phone with someone wishing me the best or answering a text. I felt so loved. I was exhausted by the end of the evening from talking. However, I just felt enveloped in a gigantic heart bubble. It was pretty amazing. Worth turning 50. On Tuesday, my aide was off…
My daughter came home. Her health insurance is still in NY and she needed to see the “female” doctor. She decided to come home Wednesday evening because she was able to get an appointment for Thursday. Otherwise she would have had to wait until some time in December. She has to go for a sonogram before she leaves Friday morning. I am just happy I got an extra day to see her that was unexpected. I just love her face….
Tuesday was a beautiful day outside. I was able to once again open windows and let some fresh air flow through the house. A rare thing in the second week of November. This is my favorite time of year. I think I have a blog post every fall saying just that. I love that there are still boats in the water. I love losing myself watching the water as the boats pass. It is always my peaceful place. The nice…
Daylights savings was Sunday morning at 2am. I am waiting for this to finally end. I know that there has been legislation within the courts. I also know that each state within each time zone has to approve it to finally do away with it. https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.usatoday.com/amp/6233980001. This weekend we gained the hour. I was up at my normal time. The clock might have said 7:30 but my body knows it is really 8:30. So do my dogs. Now it will…
Good morning. Hopefully it actually is good. It is finally fall weather outside. A lovely crisp 54 degrees. I still have a window open next to me. I am sure my aide thinks I’m insane. I love the chilly air especially when I workout. Eventually I shut them. I’m surprised with this cooler air my spasticity is still really bad in my legs. It can be very difficult to get my leg to bend. It affects my right leg more…
Sometimes I stare at this blank page and I really know what I want to say. Other times I really don’t have a clue. There are times I know what I want to say but I am to scared to say it. I fear that I might not write it properly and it would be misunderstood. This might be one of those blogs. Let me say right away I am not depressed. I am not suicidal. I am not trying…
