I was in a car for a 3 hour drive yesterday and I have to report that my strength came back. I was able to walk for the remainder of the day with little issue, or I should say my normal issues. However as I sat there my legs actually hurt. They felt sore like I ran a marathon prior. Obviously I didn’t run any marathons I just fatigued severely with MS.
The episode the day before really shook me and it shouldn’t have left this kind of mark. I’ve known in my heart how I’ve progressed with my MS. I’ve known that me being in a wheelchair was inevitable. I will still utilize my walker in my house but it’s time to use my wheelchair out of the house. I need to start conserving what energy I have. Until July when I can get a disability vehicle I have to walk to my car from my condo. That takes energy and sometimes I don’t have much. I need to preserve my energy elsewhere.
I thought of it as a form of giving up fighting but is it? Is this just the stage of the MS I’m up to? I realized that unfortunately this is just the stage I’m up to with MS. It isn’t that I’m not fighting anymore it is just the progression of my disease. I have a progressive disease that is what multiple sclerosis is, can’t deny that. Now comes the question, what now?