A Spiritual Reminder

A Spiritual Reminder

I just finished watching Midnight Mass on Netflix. Not my favorite series by any means. I found it kind of boring in parts. I didn’t stop watching the episodes so I guess it had something that kept me interested. Throughout the episodes there was religious conversations. I was intrigued with the different religious belief of each character. In the final episode there was a monologue about death by the character Erin. It was the summary of what A Course in Miracles is all about. It summarized basically what most spiritual religions are all about. I felt moved. I actually felt like someone simplified what I’m always trying remember. Since I so often share my spiritual thoughts, I wanted to post the monologue. Everyone has there own beliefs and everyone should be allowed to believe. This just explains mine. She says this regarding death but in A Course in Miracles, this is something to remember everyday. We are all energy, atoms and one. I am part of you, you are part of me. There is no self.

Myself. My self. That’s the problem. That’s the whole problem with the whole thing. That word, “self.” That’s not the word. That’s not right, that isn’t… That isn’t. How did I forget that? When did I forget that?

The body stops a cell at a time, but the brain keeps firing those neurons. Little lightning bolts, like fireworks inside, and I thought I’d despair or feel afraid, but I don’t feel any of that. None of it. Because I’m too busy. I’m too busy in this moment. Remembering.

Of course. I remember that every atom in my body was forged in a star. This matter, this body is mostly just empty space after all, and solid matter? It’s just energy vibrating very slowly and there is no me. There never was. The electrons of my body mingle and dance with the electrons of the ground below me and the air I’m no longer breathing. And I remember there is no point where any of that ends and I begin.

I remember I am energy. Not memory. Not self. My name, my personality, my choices, all came after me. I was before them and I will be after, and everything else is pictures, picked up along the way. Fleeting little dreamlets printed on the tissue of my dying brain. And I am the lightning that jumps between. I am the energy firing the neurons, and I’m returning. Just by remembering, I’m returning home.

And it’s like a drop of water falling back into the ocean, of which it’s always been a part. All things… a part. All of us… a part. You, me and my little girl, and my mother and my father, everyone who’s ever been, every plant, every animal, every atom, every star, every galaxy, all of it. More galaxies in the universe than grains of sand on the beach. And that’s what we’re talking about when we say “God.” The one. The cosmos and its infinite dreams. We are the cosmos dreaming of itself. It’ssimply a dream that I think is my life, every time. But I’ll forget this. I always do. I always forget my dreams.

But now, in this split-second, in the moment I remember, the instant I remember, I comprehend everything at once. There is no time. There is no death. Life is a dream. It’s a wish. Made again and again and again and again and again and again and on into eternity. And I am all of it. I am everything. I am all. I am that I am.


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