It’s 8:10 in the morning and I have already cleaned up after the puppies, fed the those furry munchkins, completed my work out and cleared off all my email. Why do you ask have I done so much so early in the morning? My baby, who came home late Wednesday night, had to leave for the airport. She goes to her dad for the Christmas holiday and will be back on Thursday. Unfortunately, her dad always seems to schedule these plans at rush-hour traffic times. So her plane, which is actually leaving at 10:15, caused her to have to depart the house at 7:15 because the amount of traffic she’s going to hit. Her friend that she has known since kindergarten, that is the son of my good friend as well, did the selfless task of taking her for me. I could never be in that kind of traffic and drive. My leg would be in complete spasms from that constant motion of moving back and forth over the brake.

That’s driving I cannot do anymore. I couldn’t do that kind of driving well when I was still working. If I hit too much traffic on my way home from work I would literally come in my house in tears. I remember one time I came in and Mikayla just looked at me in horror. I was just in so much pain and could barely walk and this was still before I became disabled. There was something about having to put your foot from the gas to the brake and apply pressure on the brake over and over and over again that my body just couldn’t handle. I don’t normally get pain with MS but that was one of the few instance where I had pain and it was bad. those shooting pains all through my leg that didn’t let up for a second. When you’re stuck in traffic and you’re having those pains and you already have weakness in the leg driving was just so difficult. All I could do is cry. even now writing about it I can still feel those spasms and remember that pain. I’ll be honest, know what I used to do, I would actually take a hit off my bat of a illegal marijuana. Just to try to ease it a little bit. sometimes I felt that was more the reason I couldn’t work anymore than all the other MS symptoms that were really affecting me combined. Sometimes those rides were so intense. Going to work was never an issue. I just didn’t hit traffic like that going to work, only coming home. Even then some days were better than others.

Now I don’t drive much at all anyway but I completely will avoid traffic. I’m still very comfortable in the car and don’t feel like I need hand controls, nor did disability reviewers feel that I needed hand controls. However I’m still not going out cruising in my car anytime soon. My car is used just to get me to doctors appointments, therapy, or any other appointment in my general neighborhood. The furthest I usually travel is about 5 miles away. Everywhere I go I also could avoid a parkway if there’s traffic and take side streets.  that is why I couldn’t take my sweet girl to the airport this morning and had to rely on the help of a friend. It’s now 8:37!and I haven’t heard from her that she arrives at the airport so it goes to show you how much traffic they really had.  if there wasn’t traffic this trip would’ve taken her maybe at the most 35 minutes. It’s Friday I hope everybody has a wonderful weekend.