Always Fighting

Always Fighting

Some days are better than others. I walked the hallway again yesterday and it was so hard. Ok, it was hard the first time I did it but it was so much harder yesterday. My right leg, which is normally the leg that gives less issues, was very difficult to move. It was difficult from the hip flexor. I had problems moving the leg forward. My left leg, which normally drags, has difficulty clearing a step without my foot impeding the steps. I methodically practice lifting from my hip to take each step. This usually requires most of my energy and focus towards my left leg. Yesterday, I had to focus my attention on my right leg for every step. This is extremely unusual. Every step was so difficult because my right leg just couldn’t swing through clearly. It was extremely frustrating. I’m not use to the issue being on the right side especially right when I started. I know it happens as I get tired. I did get down the hallway. I took many breaks. I didn’t care how long it took, I was getting down the hall regardless of my right leg. 30 minutes it took me to go 117ft according to my Apple Watch. It was a very slow pace. Kind of pathetic if you think about it. Especially because I am pretty positive the Apple Watch gave me credit for some feet when I sat down and fanned myself. 🙄

I am still pushing myself to improve. I’ve been in my comfy chair a few more times although I haven’t had the smoothest transfers back to my wheelchair. I’m grateful for my aides being here to lend a helping hand as I require. I did start adding my hand weights into my morning workout routine. I am back to trying to build up my upper body muscle. I also did my first workout from my wheelchair. It was a drastic difference from my bed. I had to start engaging my core again. This is not an easy thing to do, especially as I fatigue from the exercises. This was a big step because it is my road back to playing mahjong. I need to be able to handle a back and forth continuing motion as the game is played. This is something that I used to fatigue from easily before I got sick. I’d come home crippled from playing. It is the movement and the core strength that would exhaust me by the end of a game. I’d need to sit in my comfy chair for an hour or more to recover. This was when I was stronger. I have a long way to go before I could play for an afternoon. I am making strides to start building up my ability once again. I did well for my first workout back in the wheelchair. My transfer back to my bed, that didn’t go so great. Once again I thank my aide for the support.

I’m still celebrating my small victories. I’m starting to really see how the small victories have become big achievements. I’ve come a long way since the lump that got home for good in early March. It hasn’t been the easiest few months but I am definitely doing more than I thought I’d be doing. I’m so grateful. I’ve worked and fought hard I’m still fighting as always. I just am really really happy that I see some results.

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